how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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