just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Randomize
