I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
