I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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