...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
God, I missed his penis.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize