ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It's Friday. Sex?
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
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