I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
