Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize