At least make sure they are 18
Why
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
