i think my tv is drunk
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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