The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
