Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
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I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
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there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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