I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
My dick has a subreddit
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
