suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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