Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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