NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
