Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
