we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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