Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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