ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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