is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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