hotel room ftw
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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