It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
