Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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