Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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