So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm really into asian looking animals
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
