4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
