my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
