party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
