I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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