If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
