Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
