i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
