id be glad to
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
