apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize