Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
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His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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