Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
