I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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