i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
