You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
