apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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