peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
