Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
where does the pee come out of this thing
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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