so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
