# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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