Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
birth control should be required to get into college
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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