school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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