wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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