why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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