you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
